Saturday, December 19, 2020

She Must Accept Him

A woman should never marry a man with the intent to change him.

What lies behind this all too common feminine temptation if not for the sin of self-righteousness?

When a woman desires to change a man, she is essentially communicating an attitude of superiority towards him. “If only he was as neat/spiritual/smart/healthy/thoughtful as I am!”

Her demands, criticisms, not-so-subtle hints, comparisons, and constant nagging accomplish nothing. Instead of eliciting a change within his heart, these tactics almost always have the opposite effect, for men place great value on their freedom.

More than anything else, a man wishes to be accepted for who he is. Instead of focusing on any faults he may have, a woman can accept her man by always seeking to look towards his better side.

In respecting his convictions, preferences, hobbies, dreams, abilities and way of doing things, she communicates both honor and respect. He knows she is satisfied with who he is, and this knowledge leads to a closer intimacy with her.

Learning how to be an excellent wife requires a tremendous amount of humility. Without this foundational trait, change will be difficult, if not impossible. A woman striving for virtue must always possess a teachable heart. Only then can she ever hope to be her husband’s crown and dearest companion.

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